Oh what a night...I must say it was a rough day yesterday. Lincoln is off and on steroids and chemo all this month, and boy have I decided that steroids are not fun to deal with. I have a little monster at times. Thank goodness he can sometimes be a "grouch" but other times a lovable "elmo".
I had had enough yesterday...the tantrums, the crying, the yelling when he doesn't get his way. For him, it can be anything like not getting the right color of spoon, to not fixing him the food he wants right then and there, to not being able to go to grandma's. Here I thought last night I might have a moment to escape, to find solitude. Oh wait I think that might only exist in ones dreams.
Most people would like to think that their bedrooms are this place of solitude and rest. They can go there to escape all that might be going on. Maybe read quietly, watch a few shows or a good movie, maybe even SLEEP (what's that? It's so over rated, NOT). Not me! Right now my daughter has been so afraid and worried that she has been sleeping on our floor for comfort, and the last two nights my son has decided that his room and daddy in it, isn't good enough, so he has joined me in mine.
Even though it was frustrating dealing with him yesterday and then knowing that sleep would not be good, I was reminded of God's love for us. His unconditional love. The love that excepts us for who we are, where we are. "And from far away the Lord appeared to his people and said, 'I love you people with a love that will last forever... Jeremiah 31:3''
How many times do we wander off, do our own thing, frustrate Him, disappoint Him, think we can do it on our own. Does He then turn us away? Does He hold it over our heads that we let Him down, disappointed Him, hurt Him? NO...instead He is always there for us with arms wide open. He wraps us in His arms, brushes the dust off us and sets us back on the right path and gives us another chance.
No matter how frustrated I was, no matter how much I needed my space; when my son came running and wanting to snuggle you better bet these arms were wide open to embrace him.